Real vs Perfect

FullSizeRender.jpg

This past Christmas  I took some time off ( like real time off, no cell phone, no tv) and went to rest in mountains with no distractions. It was amazing. I got to read some great books, you know the kind that totally stir things up in such a beautifully disastrous way. The ones you read that you know you will reference back to as the time in your life when things shifted. ( or is it just me who has those moments?🙈)

I originally wrote this post a couple weeks after getting back , and here were my thoughts:

I was hoping to be fully recovered by now and come back better than ever but I'm left feeling a bit raw. It's as if I am seeing everything with new eyes. My perspective has shifted and I am over stimulated with thoughts. My mind is going a million miles an hour in different directions and it won't slow down. It's an amazing place to be in but the newness is uncomfortable and I find myself wanting to rush out of the process. Get back to the comfortable and known. After all it is the new year, I should be ready to dive head first into everything, right?! And being uncomfortable is never an easy place to stay. And yet I know I need to sit here a bit longer, to keep soaking it all in, to let things unfold before me as they will. To listen. It's hard not to feel a bit guilty just learning 'to be'. But for now I will 'be still' (two words that have come to me over and over for many years). What does this all mean, I'm not even sure, and that's the most beautiful part of it. 💗